I’ve read The Hearing Trumpet, which was presented earlier on the blog by my cat.

The book is described as an “occult twin of Alice in Wonderland” but I don’t think it’s accurate. If it can be compared to any book at all then it’s probably a very drunk version of Narnia.

The author, Leonora Carrington, was an eccentric person. She would cover her feet with mustard while sitting in a restaurant and would serve her guests breakfast made of their own hair that she had cut off while they were sleeping. Thus, I’m not sure if Leonora needed the help of any substances to create this book or it came to her naturally.

The book feels like a lucid dream controlled by a fantasy loving person. The story starts with an old lady and cats but quickly progresses to a fairytale touched up by an apocalyptic approach. I’m not even sure if Leonora Carrington wanted to write the book or the book just happened accidentally while Leonora was having fun imagining her dream world.

The Hearing Trumpet has a hilarious main character and is very quotable. Here are some of the quotes:

• “The fact that I have no teeth and never could wear dentures does not in any way discomfort me. I don’t have to bite anybody and there are all sorts of soft edible foods easy to procure and digestible to the stomach. […] I never eat meat as I think it is wrong to deprive animals of their life when they are so difficult to chew anyway.”
• “If I remember correctly writers usually find some excuse for their books, although why one should excuse oneself for having such a quiet and peaceful occupation I really don’t know. Military people never seem to apologize for killing each other yet novelists feel ashamed for writing some nice inert paper book that is not certain to be read by anybody.”
• “It is impossible to understand how millions and millions of people all obey a sickly collection of gentlemen that call themselves ‘Government’. […] It is a form of planetary hypnosis, and very unhealthy’”
• “I’m sure it would be very pleasant and healthy for human beings to have no authority whatever. They would have to think for themselves, instead of always being told what to do.”

I still can’t suggest this book to anybody because I’m not sure it’s possible to enjoy the book without hitting a moment of occult overdose at some point.

On Chesil Beach is a beautifully written eventless novella where graphic sex scenes are an essential part of the story. The writing style reminds me of those old classics created at times when authors didn’t care if they could interest the reader. They just immersed themselves in the process and those who were literate enough would read the result anyway. It’s a high quality writing but you have to exercise self-control to drag yourself through it because nothing at all is happening.

On Chesil Beach looks like a well prepared stage where action is about to take place. Then, suddenly, you hit the final page. All story could fit in 177 words.

The book was selected for 2007 Booker Prize shortlist which caused a few scandals because it’s not even a novel by size.

Another curious story happened when Ian McEwan mentioned that he kept two pebbles from Chesil beach while writing the book. It caused one more scandal. McEwan was threatened with a fine and had to apologise and return the pebbles back to the beach.

There’s now a movie adaptation of the story released in May 2018. Judging by the trailer, the characters look nothing like the ones described in the book. Unless the storyline was changed too I can’t even imagine what there was to film at all.

You will still like On Chesil Beach if you enjoy looking deeply into characters and dissecting their emotions, and if you don’t mind the complete absence of action.

There have been fifteen titles altogether! The reviews of all of them except one are already in the blog. Five of the titles are actual books and ten of them are audiobooks. I’ve never done so much concentrated work with books before. I love the process! Writing book posts is one of the most rewarding activities I have ever done. I always loved analysing books but the possibility to share what I think is even more thrilling.

The review I like the most on my blog is probably about Trevor Noah’s book because it has lots of outdoor photos.

The best book I read this month is The Air You Breathe by Frances de Pontes Peebles. I’m still missing the characters.

Other books that I consider definitely worthy of attention are A Man Called Ove, Everything Under and Born a Crime. The books that I would have easily done without are all the thrillers I listened to. They are in falling stars and thrillers categories in my blog.

My favourite non-review post is about Kindle vs print. I feel like this topic should be explored even deeper.

Right now the blog has 64 followers. I’ve had conversations with some of them. I love staying in touch with an amazing artist, my friend from many epochs, the author of Neowatercolor blog. Her paintings are unique, beautiful and emotional. Thanks to my blog I was introduced to another awesome blog called Same Scene Different Story. It has an idea I’ve never met before. Several writers compose their stories based on the same photo. I find it very inspirational. I loved staying in touch with Nsfordwriter, Ova and Umut. Nsfordwriter is also a new blog. Its author reviews books and sometimes posts examples of her own writing. Ova and Umut always have great book suggestions. It’s priceless to know people who can suggest good books to you.

That’s a short summary of the first month. I’m looking forward to the next month, new books and more interesting people to meet.

Happy Birthday dear Blog!  

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Sold on a Monday by Kristina McMorris is about a group of cliched characters dancing around a well-knit plot. The characters are a damsel in distress, two knights in shining armour; one is a loser with a good heart, another one is a winner with a hard one. Her choice is very original [Sarcasm].

There are menacing parents who “love in their own way”, strict bosses with the same tough love, and kids with shallow kid-talks.

The storylines are strikingly predictable but there are no loose ends. Most characters have a dramatic past up their sleeve to talk about while violins are playing on the background. All obstacles comfortably turn out to be from the dark side so they are subject to rightful demolition. All little Chekhov’s guns that are spread along the novel shoot at some point. It’s still awkward that the plot exists just because the main character screwed up. Initially I thought the story could make a good movie even when failing as a good book. By the end of the book, though, the characters were so cemented in cliches they looked like cardboard figures that even a movie wouldn’t revive.

As for the writing, I believe if I ever see one more “torso” with “muscles of his arms defined by shadows” my book will fly out of the window even if it’s a Kindle. Some authors seem to think the readers should be lured to the book in the same manner soap advertisers tried to lure customers in the 90s.

Also, dear Sir/Madam who teaches authors how to create realistic characters, can you please stop telling them that characters should restate their beliefs in follow-up phrases?! Phrases like “He was happy, he truly was” and “They will be all right, they both will” belong to cardboard characters. They truly do.

I’m not sure if I’m giving the book 2.5 stars because it really deserves that many or because I’m experiencing a version of Stockholm syndrome. The book is new. It was published just two days ago. I couldn’t preview the book before it appeared in my Kindle. I had preordered it and so I was stuck with it. Thus, I might have had no other option but to like it at least for 2.5 stars.

I would not suggest this book to anybody. And maybe preordering a book is also a bad idea .

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The Third Policeman was written by a person called Brian O’Nolan under the pseudonym Flann O’Brien. It was written between 1939 and 1940 but was published only much later by O’Nolan’s widow. It was called a masterpiece, but O’Nolan never learned about this. During his life two publishers refused to publish his book. One of the publishers told O’Nolan to “become less fantastic”. O’Nolan then placed the manuscript in his kitchen where he could see it, but told his friends that the manuscript was lost when it flew out of his car, page by page.

The Third Policeman is surreal, absurd and funny. I listened to the audiobook which is not the best medium for this book. It should be read to be understood better. Still, it seems like at some places the book is supposed to be too absurd to comprehend.

The Third Policeman is like Alice in Wonderland where Alice is a one-legged criminal and the Wonderland is macabre and even more surreal.

The aftertaste of the book is dark and haunting but you will laugh a lot while reading it. I laughed so hard I disturbed people around me. At some places, though, the book gets so tedious it feels like toothache. It is boring for the same reason as it is genius. The book’s essence is in its dialogues and philosophy. There are many references to the works of a fictional philosopher called De Selby. De Selby has lots of peculiar beliefs. For example, one of his theories is that the Earth is not a sphere but a sausage. For each such theory De Selby provides a proof. It gets simultaneously boring and funny, you never know which one will happen next. De Selby as a creation was so successful that he was used in other books too, one of which was written by a different author.

The ideas of The Third Policeman were used for Lost TV series. Also, I can see the resemblance between the book’s ideas and the ones of Lucifer TV series.

The Third Policeman is an influential book. It might be disliked by readers who prefer more action, but it’s the right book for people with an unconventional sense of humor who wouldn’t mind to be puzzled by impossible ideas.

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Trevor called his memoir Born a Crime because that’s what Trevor was. He was born to a black mother and to a white father in South Africa during apartheid. That was a crime. Parents could go to jail for this, Trevor could be taken from his family and placed in an orphanage. His mom had to photobomb family photos taken outside because she had to pretend she was not his mom but a servant. They had to sneak out to see his father. Trevor had to spend most of his childhood behind closed doors. They lived in a city designed in such a way that it could be easily bombed in case of an uprising. How Trevor Noah managed to turn it all into a heartwarming, moving and funny story is a mystery to me, but he definitely achieved this.The book has taught me so much. I mean not only historical and cultural facts that are not known to an average person from Europe thanks to education system that has other priorities, but also for putting everything into perspective. The book shows you that you believed in something without even knowing it and that you took many things for granted.Born a Crime has many interesting thoughts. I especially loved the one on racism and how it is easily destroyed by language. A person can only hate something that sounds different. As soon as you start speaking their language they understand that you are one of them. I love Trevor’s book because it uncovers many of such gems, and does this without any pompousness or drama.At some point I was actually ready to cut one star of the book for Trevor’s dismissive attitude to cats. It’s my judgement after all and it can, indeed, be influenced by such details. The star was soon restored. Even my overprotection of cats couldn’t outweigh the awesomeness of the book. By the end of the book I felt awkward for having even considered giving the book anything less than five stars.Such books teach you more than any education programs or historical works. They are as truthful representation of a reality as there can be. Yes, they are personal and subjective but they are not brushed over by a system and so they are always more genuine.I’m very thankful to the book and I would suggest anybody to read it. I would also advise getting the audio version first if you are fine with audiobooks. Trevor’s performance is priceless.

You always know when you are reading a good book. It doesn’t feel like a book. You see no traces of backstage manipulations, no tricks, no author. The story is alive on its own.

The Air You Breathe by Frances de Pontes Peebles feels so real I had to double-check it’s not a memoir. Even when I already knew the characters were fictional (although they were partially based on real people) I was still googling for them. I wanted to see what they looked like even though I knew they never existed. That’s the closest I could find.

According to the interview with the author, these two singers, Carmen Miranda and Chavela Vargas, were the inspiration for some of the characters’ traits and stories.

In some sources The Air You Breathe is called a saga. It does indeed cover a lifelong story but it doesn’t feel unbearably huge. Reading it is like listening to a person who is speaking about her love for a person and for music.

The music is so palpable it gives the book a new dimension. I now know samba without having ever listened to it before.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76R6O1va9iM?rel=0&w=560&h=315]

At first, I was thinking the book would make a great movie. There are so many amazing visuals, really good songs. But the more the story developed the more I understood a movie might turn this story into another postproduction amputee. There are too many depths and precious moments for a movie to handle. I just hope that if the story is ever picked up for an adaptation it will be preserved as it is.

Such books are not born overnight. I don’t even mean all the research that went into The Air Your Breathe to show the readers Brazil in the 30s and Hollywood in the 40s. I mean the maturity of the book. It feels like classic even though it was published just three days ago. Such quality requires not only skill and talent but time to brew. I contacted Frances de Pontes Peebles, the author, for more information and found out that my perception was right. Frances said it took her 9 years to write the book.

I feel lucky to have found this book and to be living at times when I could get it with one click. I also feel a bit envious of those who haven’t read it yet. They have yet to meet the characters, whom I already miss, and to enjoy a really good book.

When I was a kid a special type of books was very popular. The genre could be called romance with erotical scenes as the main reason for the books to be written. Housewives frantically exchanged those cheap paperbacks hiding them from kids and reading them by packs. The books contained no plot, no decent dialogues, no character development apart from characters being beautiful and having sex whenever the plot allowed.

Have modern thrillers taken the place of those books? Is there a target audience for whom certain types of books are produced? These audience oriented books contain a number of obligatory elements that are to be squeezed in regardless of the plot.

The Girl Before is a classic example of such a product. The story is so dumb its mere existence is possible only due to the real estate market being bad. The characters agree to follow the rules of a bizarre landlord because they can’t find anywhere else to live. Is the market in London really so bad or it’s just an invented factor?

Looks like the target audience of the book is supposed to be interested in:

• What the characters are wearing. All of them, always, everywhere, in details; color, material, shape, size, texture. Nothing of it is related to the plot.
• Men who serve as furniture for the book; “slick body under the shower water”.
• detailed sex scenes.
• OB visits, pregnancy tests, pregnancy symptoms discussed at length with no purpose for the plot.
• Parenting problems not related to the plot.

While many books are infected with a certain set of words that authors think make the dialogues sound more natural, in case of The Girl Before the infestation is severe. At one point the word “somehow”, the most popular parasite, is used 4 times by different characters within one scene. The same happens with “that’s all” which is plopped at the end of a phrase regardless of the situation. Somehow it’s just another bad book that’s all. By the end of the book there’s a risk of developing a strong allergic reaction to the words due to overexposure.

The behaviour of the characters often doesn’t match the situation. “I can never say if you are joking” says a character to the one who never jokes. Another character keeps gulping down tons of sadistically cooked food. It can serve as a demonstration of personal traits when done for the first time but it keeps being repeated along the whole book, probably to make the book more salient; hey, the plot was dumb as were the characters, but they had sex and ate live fish so now the book is stuck in my memory.

Surprising as it may sound, there are still two good things to be thankful for. The first one is that narcissistic people and sociopaths are described quite well. I believe many people can benefit from learning what those disorders are and how they manifest themselves.

The second nice thing happens in the audiobook. A complete silence is used to illustrate a situation. The silence creates such a powerful effect that I listened to it several times. I’ve never rewound any record before to listen to its silence. That silence is a brilliant idea. I hope more audiobooks will pick up this tool.

With this book I’m putting on hold my reviews of thrillers. I need some literary detox. There will be one more thriller-related rant but otherwise better books will be discussed. Stay tuned!

You know how sometimes you go to a shop with very poor choice or quality of products and after some time of browsing through mediocre options you start liking things you wouldn’t like if there originally was a better choice?

That’s what’s happening with my judgement of thrillers. This month has been filled with such bad thrillers that my perception has adjusted. I no longer expect clever characters. Maybe a thriller’s plot cannot happen without their stupidity? I no longer expect to be surprised about who the villain is. I’m thankful to be just slightly entertained. I’m thankful if the word “somehow” does not pop up in each line of internal monologues.

With all that new judgement adjustment I was intending to give Behind her Eyes by Sarah Pinborough four stars. Only some of the characters are idiots. The villain becomes obvious twenty percent into the book but you still can’t guess what’s going on so you have a reason to go on with the book. You watch females in love, a blond guy, and psychological abnormalities entangled together and heading somewhere unpredictable as the end gets nearer. After all the predictable thrillers that unpredictability alone deserves four stars.

Suddenly, eighty percent into the book it becomes clear why you can’t guess what’s going on. Apparently, the book is of a different genre altogether!

Imagine a Sherlock Holmes story where a mystery is explained by a green gnome living under a kitchen sink. You thought you were reading a gnome-free story but a gnome becomes the main tool of the plot. Eighty percent into the story! It’s literature, so everything can happen. At least that seems to be the author’s opinion.

The four stars quickly lost two of their mates after that. The remaining two stars are still a product of a perspective adjustment. Had it been another genre I would not have forgiven the language, the stupidity of characters, the “green gnome” plot twist. But I have learned not to expect much from a thriller, so Behind her Eyes does receive two stars from me, although it is a generous rating.

Like any proper witch I have cats. They like books, partially because every time a book arrives it’s a novelty and it’s cozy to lie on. Looks like Kindle is not that cozy to lie on.

Pirate the cat was the first one to get his paws on the book this time. Thus, he’s happy to present to you: The Hearing Trumpet by Leonora Carrington!

The first special thing about this book is that it’s not available on Kindle. This blog says there are 6 million books available on Kindle, but The Hearing Trumpet is not one of them.

The book promises to be Alice in Wonderland for adults. Judging by some of its illustrations it’s definitely not for kids.

It feels almost unfamiliar to be holding an actual book. Don’t your hands get tired of books? You can’t simply position a book wherever you want. You have to control this pile of papers so it doesn’t fall, or close, or get flipped over to another page.

Also, the quality of the print is not that good. The pages feel like cheap toilet paper and the paint spreads around letters like on a sponge. The letters on Kindle look much sharper.

It’s not a big deal, of course. A book is still a book no matter the format. Don’t you think so? I’m off to read it now. I’ll let you know if I like it.